After much cajoling, threatening, begging and underhand tactics I am getting a puppy! Yes I know I agreed that as my health got worse and my mobility became more of a problem we wouldn't have any more pets but just as I couldn't refuse the gorgeous little ginger kitten daughter no3 brought me for my birthday 8 years ago I am not going to be able to refuse daughter no2 when she brings round the adorable little girl puppy I have been watching grow for the past few weeks for my birthday next month am I? Well you just couldn't could you?
I have tried to talk sense to myself 'pets are a tie' 'dogs need exercise' 'the pup will probably need clearing up after' ' the added expense'
But for every negative I have positives, I love the loyalty of a dog, the companionship.
The cat is lovely and he can be affectionate but he has a definite disdain for humans and his loyalty is to whomever has the tin of tuna at the time. We have always had cats and dogs. The 3 girls grew up with pets and the house doesn't feel the same without a dog in residence.
It really has become a case of heart against head and heart has won in my case. Hubby put up a good fight but he was ground down in the end and although he still shakes his head when the pup is mentioned I think he knows it's a lost cause.
Those of you that have been following my blogs will know I have been having problems with medication recently.
The last few weeks have been so rough I have decided to stay on my current medication regime and cope as best I can for now.
But one thing that has raised its head for me again is having to find the acceptance from somewhere deep within that this is life for me, there is no 'getting better' or going back to being able to do the things I can no longer do, this is it and it's only going to get worse!
Quite how you get your head round that I don't know, I just know I have to otherwise I am likely to send myself mad with grief at what I have lost.
It may sound dramatic to those of you who are in reasonable health but I know those of you who face the daily challenges associated with long term sickness or chronic medical conditions will know where I am coming from.
There's no point in the 'what ifs' or the 'why me' it is me and it's not going away so the only options I have is give in, that's really not an option, or accept it.
I choose to accept it as much as I can, this doesn't make me weak and it certainly doesn't come easily but it brings it's own bit of peace once I reach that acceptance.
The downright ugly....
I am not political, not at all and I am the first to admit to having virtually no understanding of economics or many of the political things that go on but I do understand bullying, unfairness and injustice. I have watched with disbelief as this government pulled the welfare state to pieces, shock when they started on the NHS and horror when it became obvious how much suffering they were piling on the elderly and vulnerable in our society.
I became increasingly alarmed when the media played the governments blame game and saddened at the stories of disabled and vulnerable people being spat at and reviled on our streets.
I watched with some satisfaction as organisations started to pull the governments rhetoric to pieces, proving again and again they were greedy liars.
I was heartened to see groups of ordinary people coming together to protest against what was happening, I was proud of my fellow man showing the depth of feeling felt by us all.
But I remain incredulous that this Government has continued on its path of destruction without batting an eye to the discourse, ignoring the hatred aimed at them, turning away from the despair and crisis they are causing whilst continuing to line their own pockets with no fear for their own future.
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