Am I the right kind of person to be writing a blog? Is there a 'certain type' that writes blogs? I am thinking that yes there is and I am possibly not it.
I started writing this blog purely through chance, I found Blogger and it is such an easy application to use I thought I would give it a go and join the blogging world.
I originally thought I would just write about myself,my life, my feelings and things that affect me. No problem with that, it would possibly appeal to my friends on twitter, those who maybe would like to know me a bit better than the 140 characters allow. So Penny's points was born.
I was surprised at how interested I then was in how many were reading the blog,the comments that were being left and the people who seemed to be interested in what I wrote. I found myself checking my stats often, far more often that was healthy really! Had my usual friends seen this one? Had they commented on it? Had they 'liked' what I had written? Oh dear, I am starting to feel like that young girl again who is trying too hard to gain approval. I told myself I wouldn't feel bad if people disagreed with me, criticised my blog or didn't read it at all, but I do!
One of the characteristics of my personality that I am fully aware of but unable to change is my sensitivity to others, it's hard to explain but I actually 'feel' for other people, fine you may say for my family and friends, that's normal surely? But for everyone? People I talk to? People I read comments about?
Let me give you an example....
I watched a person on twitter being picked on by others, in all honesty she had started it and to a point probably deserved it but when she consequently deleted her account I 'felt' awful for her. Now I had no hand in any of it, she wasn't even someone I spoke to much but I watched for weeks to see if she came back, thought about her and worried about how she must be feeling.
Yes, I got over it but I think you would agree it's a bit extreme.
So is this really a good idea? Blogging and opening myself up to others?
Yes it's fine when it's all sweet and agreeable, it boosts me up I won't pretend it doesn't, it makes me feel valued that bit more, it makes me feel worthy when people are interested in what I write. But what when it's negative? I'm not good with criticism, who is? But if justified I will take and absorb it but when something I have written leads to cross words among others I am not sure I can handle that, my blog becomes something other than the platform for me to ramble, give my views, air my feelings and share parts of my life, and I am not sure I can cope with the feelings this brings out in me, I'm not sure I want to feel responsible for causing friction or bad feeling because I 'feel' it too. So I am thinking seriously about blogging and is it for me?
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad